no im not "Dying inside" literally, That would be, well for lack of a manlier word, Icky. And the thing is that, me myself and I always thought that, well I wouldnt change, wouldnt conform to the norm just for one person or for one reason.
well I did and im not any happier about it tahn Myself, hes the most pissed i must say. lol. But lately the reason i said dead inside, was because lately i dont give a shit, i just dont. I can put on my happy suit, and dance around and be a light in the dark but right now i dont care about you or your problems, sorry but i got my own. I got shit that ive messed up, shit ive fucked up and shit i just neglected till it died on its own.
you know The feeling. That no matter what you do you mess up? well im not feeling it right now. I know i can make an example of myself at times, but i just dont want to. Seeing as shit i've done has done worse things to other people, and an image towards myself i never cared about until now.

Doesnt mean that i value your opinion about me, o no i could care less if you hate me. its just htat i care if you like me.....
Sure im an ass, and im one big ass sometimes. But the thing is that the more i lived life... did something i wasnt supposed to, yelled at a teacher, hit my dad when he yells at me, use only my left arm to pick a kid up 2 ft into the air and then slam him into the ground.
I realized that sure, thats all fun and games for the beginning, but try going to movies and laughing with someone when your that kid, ya know. (ALl things ive done btw)
s

Then we come to the topic of this. when you liek to make jokes and jokes at other peoples expense you have to be aware and consciencous of hwo you will be percieved.

All of a sudden, you realize what the hell your doing too late.

and None of this will be elaborated upon unless i feel like it
YAY!